[Writingworkshop] Last Person Singular

[Neale Morison]

Thanks Antony. If you can remember what the typos and the awkward bits 
are I would greatly appreciate it.

This story has to be long enough to get a bit of historical sweep, and 
to establish the pace that makes the tiny events of child raising and 
cats and growing machine intelligence loom large. I can't think of how 
to cut it down either.

I'll tweak it and prod it for a while and then maybe try it out and see 
if anyone will forgive me for writing over 7500 words. I knew it was 
going to be a bit long, but that limit is news to me. Where do you know 
it from?

And by the way, you're the expert. Does the cat work?

Thanks,
Neale


Antony Nigel Donovan wrote:
> I found a couple of typos (but didn't write them down because I didn't
> want to interrupt my reading).  I also found a few awkward spots (ibid).
>
> I think it's a very good story in the AI genre.  It seems to evolve
> naturally towards a conclusion that isn't obvious, which is very good.
> And you managed an ending interpretable as happy.  Bravo. 
>
> My only concern is that some of my appreciation of the story is related
> to my knowledge of the man on whom the narrator is modeled. Oh, and that
> the story is running close to eleven thousand words.  I can't think of
> how you'd cut it down to 7500 (standard max for great stories by
> non-name authors).
>
> Antony
>
> On Fri, 2009-06-19 at 10:52 -0400, Adam Holland wrote:
>   
>> wow!
>>
>> Excited to read it.
>> And I hope to have some comments on the Uncomfortablists soon.
>>
>> On Fri, Jun 19, 2009 at 10:20 AM, Neale Morison
>> <neale at nealemorison.com> wrote:
>>         http://www.nealemorison.com/writing/shortstories/LastPersonSingular.pdf
>>         
>>         The lead character in this story is someone you may recognize
>>         from Joe Haldeman's forum. He's been very helpful and reviewed
>>         it. He says he doesn't find it intrusive or exploitative.
>>         
>>         I looked back over the forum posts and I asked him if I could
>>         use him on 18 May. After I finished off Specs on 23rd May I
>>         spent a week and a half thinking about this and  started
>>         writing  on  3rd June. This took 12 days at a little over 850
>>         words a day for the first draft. Then I trickled out  a second
>>         draft with minor tweaks at couple of hundred words a day.
>>         
>>         I'm starting to get over the compulsion to keep on going
>>         without a break for fear I'll never finish the story. It's a
>>         reasonable fear though. I have a long backlog of things
>>         started and not finished.
>>         
>>         I sent Specs to Asimov Magazine. We shall see.
>>         
>>         All the best,
>>         Neale
>>         
>>         -- 
>>         Neale Morison
>>         neale at nealemorison.com
>>         http://www.nealemorison.com
>>         35 Frazer St, Leichhardt NSW 2040
>>         +61 417 661 427
>>         
>>         
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-- 
Neale Morison
neale at nealemorison.com
http://www.nealemorison.com
35 Frazer St, Leichhardt NSW 2040
+61 417 661 427

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